07 September 2013

gratuitous blog post of the summer.

i never post on here anymore [obviously], but here's a whack at what's been going on.

album is finished but not yet released- needs artwork. i'm fairly happy with the end result, although it's difficult to be completely objective about it. it's been quite "the process". who knows when it'll be released? motivation eludes me.

i've had a quiet summer, having been thoroughly exhausted and diagnosed with adrenal fatigue, after traveling all spring. the traveling was wonderful, and the quiet restful season has been wonderful in a different way. i've read 30+ books this summer. i've also ridden my bicycle, reveled in picking from the garden, and slept 14 hours a day for weeks on end. i'm not working anymore; doc's orders for a month, but until i feel significantly better i'll not be working. it's kind of really nice.

my brothers played worship with me at church this summer, and at camp a few times. now one is in california and the other in italy, as they both study at bible college. i'll miss them. i'm the only kid at home now. i'm hoping to visit italy this winter, if all goes well. my oldest brother brought the nephews and dinner over last night, and we had a grand old time. my mum has been taking the nephews for nature walks at the state park every week, and i've been joining them. we find frogs, leaves, ovenbirds, and crayfish, get sunburnt and muddy, and have picnics which always end in ninja-snap cookies. it's lovely.

i had a lymph node removed from my neck this week, and i'm still recovering from surgery [which means feeling less well]. biopsy will come in a few days. my life is one long extended health problem, it seems! i don't feel terrible, but i haven't felt great for many months. come what may, i'm confident that the Lord knows, sees, and is always good.

i'm surprisingly ready for fall weather, as august was rather brutal toward its last weeks, but unnerved by the thought of winter. i'm sad to see the sun setting earlier every day, but always happy to see it set, nonetheless. in a few days my parents and i will head toward the border for a lovely few days spent relaxing on the north shore. i really can't wait.

life never remains the same, does it? last year at this time i was racing pell-mell between ministries and bible studies and worship nights and discipleship and meetings and work and friends, and barely sleeping; this year i'm not, but i'm well-rested enough to notice the smaller delights of life. i'm learning to stress less, and to enjoy more. to say yes less immediately, and no more confidently. to keep margin in my life. perhaps i've gone a bit overboard and have become a hermit; but i'm really quite content to just be and not do. the things i do are heartfelt, and who i am is more assured. it's been necessary.

life is never as expected either, is it? i'd made ever so many plans and thoughts for this season, but i find myself in an entirely new realm that's unseen, unknown, and not changing very fast. so be it. "take your share of the suffering...and do it in the power of God" are the words spoken from 2 timothy to my heart these past couple of days. no routine shall exist forever. no plans shall stand unless the Lord establishes them. i'm willing to go and to do, but not nearly so desperate about it. life is meant to be lived, not just ground out as fast as possible.

so here i am. "whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, 'It is well, it is well with my soul.'"